Wednesday, April 1, 2009

When Gender Matters and Not

When Gender Matters :

1. My 4 year old son has threatened to disown me if I wear as he calls it 'yucky' nail paint and come to his pre- school !!!!. I am amused that though his father dare not challenge my life choices in any way, this pint sized genius is already dictating terms. My 2 year old daughter on the other has threatened to disown me over the same commodity but for a different reason...she wants to me to paint her tiny nails pink or else..........

2. My son couldn't care less what I dressed him in. The occasional Thomas T - shirt does light up his eyes but it really does not matter. My 2 year old already has a mind of her own and a distinct style. She wants to be dressed in only frilly pink things which she believes transform her into a "pitty pinchesh" (read pretty princess)

3. My son does not know where and why the mirror exists. My daughter checks herself out every time she is changed, hair accessorized, dressed or simply... for no particular reason at all... running to the mirror saying "dekhna hai or lemme sheeee"

4. My son owns 2 pairs of shoes. My daughter has at least 4 at any given point of time .

5. If hubby and I hug in front of the kids my son will stick out his tongue and squint, a sign that he is embarrassed or pretend he is not seeing what he is really daughter on the other hand runs and hugs her dad's leg vying for and successfully managing an immediate transfer of affection.

6. My son hates to talk on the phone and my daughter hates to hang up...already.

7. My son ends up fighting with the girls he likes, not knowing how to please them and emote correctly. My daughter charms, and bedazzles anyone into submission.

And sometimes Gender Matters... not :

1. My son is more likely to come home crying after a fight, and my daughter more likely to send her opponent crying.

2. Though my daughter loves to think of herself as a 'pinchesh' she plays with her brother's cars, trains and trucks, barely giving a second glance to her dolls.

3. Sometimes its the order of birth which makes a difference I am told. My son the first born is a perfectionist who shed tears even if he gets 1 wrong out of 10. My second born is brimming with confidence and even the attempt to do something, forget success at it, qualifies for her running around in circles singing 'I am the Winner'.


Renu said...

When I started reading the post I thought may be genes are important:)
and then....I think its individuality only coupled with surroundings.

Anonymous said...

Aaj kal ke bacche, so, now you are in catch 22, right.

For the point two do, read IHM, last post of, "Pink Dress"

Chrysalis, 1. My son is more likely to come home crying after a fight, and my daughter more likely to send her opponent crying. Is awesome, they'll form a good team.

This post proves, that as we grow older, society poisons our minds with non sense and conditions it.

BTW: Please enable anno. commenting, it is hard for wordpress uses to comment this way. :)

Chrysalis said...


Enable whaaaat? I wish you had given me directions on how to do that. If I am anything I am a TECHNICAL RETARD!!! Anyways will try to figure it out. :)

Kislay said...

Interesting post . Btw , absolutely loved your thinking out loud thingy . Makes a lot of sense .

Nisha said...

kids today..uff!it must be so amazing to watch them grow old with such differences... and a few yrs from now...all these habits that seem so cute now will become irritating!enjoy the phase

Chrysalis said...

Welcome here. Thanks for agree on my thinking aloud. If you like that you will find my next one pretty interesting too. It is on religion. Do revisit.


I know what u r saying. I am enjoying it besides going crazy and almost dying of exhaustion.

Viv said...

Times are changing, I see two messages coming out of it:
1.The fair sex is no more the laid-back, low profile creed, but instead fast upstaging their male counterparts. And you see a live example in your family!
2.The "female charm" still plays a big role in this pursuit and apparently the female sex learns it quite early in life!!
The comments are not meant to be taken seriously, it's all in the lighter vein.

Smitha said...

Oh your kids seem so adorable.. I used to be of the view that girls and boys learn from the environment and that there is no real difference wrt gender.. But my 3 yr old daughter has changed a lot of my pre-conceptions :)

Chrysalis said...


Thanks. I guess kids have one purpose in life amongst a host of others...breaking pre conceived notions .:)

sumitk said...

FWIW, not everything on the list is gender specific. My son has more than a passing interest in how he dresses, and has strong apparel and footwear faves and dislikes. He's unfazed by filial hugs, will check himself out in the mirror, and while he won't himself touch nailpaint, he likes his women (read mother) prettied up, and is handy with compliments. But then, he hates to talk on the phone, and will cry easily but not for long in fights.

For the most part, what you're observing are simply personality differences.

Chrysalis said...


I agree with you. This is a post in lighter vein. Making no socio psychological conclusions with this one.And yes welcome to my space.