Saturday, February 21, 2009

Friends and the City

I know I am running behind, but I was thrilled to watch Sex and the City -The Movie. FINALLY!. Though I saw it with many an interruption but I did make the effort to make it a pleasurable experience for myself.....the alchohol removed champagne,caprese stacks etc. (I fear I might have overdone it which does not bode well for the 10lbs. I am desperate to lose :( )
I do wish I could have done it in style and in some good female company but...what the heck...a pair of red and white polka dot flannel pajamas, and regular interruptions (had to deal with ink stamps and dirty little fingers, Curious George online games and chocolate milk) did not take away from the experience.

Besides drooling over the delicious outfits, bags and shoes (I am a girlie girl)what struck me most and stayed with me afterwards was the strong and lasting female friendships portrayed in the movie. I did not see the TV series to be honest, but loved the movie nonetheless. And I craved and how so, for female bonding and companionship. Not that I am lacking for it, but I missed and remembered all those girls who have crossed my path and have turned into even lovelier women. So here is an ode to some of the women who are great friends and some who I wish were:

The Activist :
She is a fierce , beautiful, strong, opinionated woman who is so different from me and yet so fundamentally similar. I am thankful we discovered what we had in common and hit it off. She smoked, she drank, she was/is loud and many hate her guts and her brains. I love her for the same ( the guts and the brains). She is someone with whom I contemplated unmentionable career choices (don't know why , she was probably drunk and I have no justifications), starting a NGO to fight for speedy trials and work on improvements in the justice system. She is doing better than planned and is fighting for the environment and the people, getting jailed and man-handled,travelling third class,....what not......
She is someone who I hold very dear and a peer that I genuinely admire.

Medusa :
I christened her Medusa, because she wandered around at unearthly hours in the hostel reading Marxian theories. She was almost mouselike in her demeanor at times and lion like, in her knowledge. I for some reason have always felt protective of her and by some sad twist of fate she has seen more than her share of tough times. I feel guilty for not being with her during those moments.

Roomie :
She was my first roomie and she was and probably still is a mother hen. We were a sight to behold...atleast 6 inches apart in hieght. But we shared the same values and the same small town dreams. She was a 'good girl' and I almost felt a little scared to let the 'bad girl' in me play out in front of her. For a 'good girl' ...she surprised me later in life with her own volatile love story and happy ending ,touchwood. So much for predictability. She is someone I know I can go running to for some TLC and hot soup on a cold day.

The Southie :
Another dear friend whose wedding left me bedazzled ...a regular Reddy wedding with diamonds and gold and heavier than body weight, Kanjeevarams....her simplicity is endearing and she is someone who is so easy to be around. I miss her and sense that a good heart to heart talk is long due.

My Support System in a Foriegn Land :
These are a group of women whom I would have never befriended. And what a loss it would have been. We would have crossed paths without stopping to talk merely because of our differences in education, interests, the way we verbalize and its not the language I am referring to. Thanks to them I realize these differences are so over hyped and there are some things which rise above all this and way more meaningful. I have formed some of the most precious friendships with people whom I have very little in common. But, being there for someone... sees no bar. From Goa connections,to an artist, to the chawl girl whose tenacity never ceases to amaze me. From absolute large heartedness, to total selflessness, to petty quarrels, to the only ray of hope in the long , cold New Jersey winters, from spouse cribbing sessions, to giggling over intimate details, from pot lucks and yoga sessions to girls night outs, from exchanging how to raise your child tips to discussing philosophy and spirituality, its been a joyous ride.

Wish I were more friendly with these friends/acquaintences :
These are girls I knew at school/college/work or some point of my life whom I admire for some or the other reason and wish I knew them better. The intelligent but rude and obnoxious Bong, from school (sorry thats how I remember her and I am sure she remembers me as worse )who has turned into this brilliant and sensitive writer. I read her posts and wish I could meet her over a cuppa coffee and talk about movies, books, politics anything and everything.

There are some fashionistas whose sense of style is jaw dropping and how I wish I could have them for a shopping guide considering that I hate shopping though I do love the goodies. Some seemingly live their lives with such abandon that I would love to take a leaf out of thier book.Some who drove me nuts yet were so intellectually and emotionally stimulating (yet another Bong from Grad school)

Some whom I remember as sweet gentle souls from a bygone era whom I would love to reconnect with...not just on social networking sites. I wonder about their well being and wish only the best for them. Some who I met fleetingly but who left a huge impression on me, and the desire to befriend them.

The bottomline being I am a woman through and through and though I could live without many things , I dont think I could survive and if yes, barely so without female bonding and companionship. To all the men who lent a patient ear and have been/are a part of my life,...... I owe you one, too.

So here's raising a toast to all the women in my life and to everlasting frinedships.Cheers!!!